Trying To Write a Prem Kahaani

Looking for Love Himself, in love with the lovely and the lovable. Translates to: pretentious (re)blogging and occasional rambling.

Jun 16

An Update + A Year On Tumblr

Thanks be to God, the tumours turned out not to be malignant and though they have to be observed because they might “activate” or behave unexpectedly, my Mama is not in danger right now. I can’t even talk about how much of a relief it is to me. Thank you, once again, to everyone who prayed for Her and for my family.

Recently, I seem to blog - if at all - only long and personal text posts, but I just can’t help but make another one.

I do hope to start blogging normally again soon. Right now I’m in the middle of my exam session, so it should be the busiest time of the year for me - but I want to come back and be here regularily by and by, at least from the day my vacation starts. I want to make blogging a part of my schedule. I want to be better at it and to nurture relationships that are to be had here.

I’ve just realised that it must’ve been about a year ago I created this blog, so I went and checked… The actual date is in May, but after that I wouldn’t post anything for a month - academically the busiest time, y’know… and also I was still uncertain and afraid. If that’s not a symbol of how I run this thing, I don’t know what is… …So I started it on May 5th but actually embarked on this adventure on June 8th.

To be honest, I can’t  believe it’s been a year already and at the same time it doesn’t even seem that long. I certainly still feel like a newbie. Still haven’t figured out like 50% of options, still cannot grasp the whole “social media” thing, really (hence even this very post, in a way), still wonder if there even is a place for me here… But I would be plain ungrateful if I didn’t realise that yes, there is a place for me here, for things have worked out for me in a way that is absolutely beyond what I’d ever imagined it could become.

And that is because of the wonderful people here. Only recently I have realised to what degree we can actually be here for each other. The support I’ve gotten couldn’t be more real. Prayer is an actual, live, most powerful help that complete strangers have offered to my loved ones without hesitation. In a way it’s completely normal and the usual state of affairs - it’s how the communion of Church works and it’s hardly the first time I’ve seen it in action - but it’s wonderful to realise how much we can really connect through Tumblr. And it's been wonderful to experience first-hand what a few kind words can mean. I smile at each notification, so I cannot even tell you what it’s meant to me to receive messages and asks - ones showing that someone actually reads my blog, my posts, that someone cares to write to me. I try to keep it cool and miserably fail, but it makes me so happy. People have acknowleded my personal posts, replied to me, helped me, entered into a conversation with me; people put up with my fangirling and/or pretentiousness daily; people shared in my joys and passions; people cared for me enough to reach out to me in the darkest hours of my life. Yes, this is simply what Tumblr is for. But isn’t it wonderful? How could I take it for granted? It’s about all the beautiful and interesting things in the world that we can show and share our appreciation for; but it’s even more, it’s about personal stories and real lives being touched in so many ways, small and great ones.

And this still scares me - all this reality, all those amazing people (who am I to be a part of it?), all this existing one has to do. I’m a coward. But people are what’s really important in life. And they are what makes it all worth it.

Thank you to the people I actually became close to - you are my friends and I thank the Lord for you. I wish I could thank all the people who have shown incredible kindness to me, who I had at least the pleasure of talking to, who made me happy and comfortable by just noticing me, who make me happy just through their blogs, who have been an inspiration to me… Thank you - to each and every one of my followers. You already are dear to me. I would really, really love to talk to you. But the very thought that you are here is mind-boggling.

This one year has been a ride - and this site has become a huge part of my life. It has become a source of so many good things. Sure, it has also served me to run away from life, to procrastinate and escape - but that’s only my own fault. And every time I’m here it also gives me new and unexpected strength, joy, perspective and hope. It gave me relationships beyond what I had thought was even possible, it gave me the support and strength on the scale I could never have expected. I can’t even say how grateful I am for this. And that’s so much more than just this one slightly silly blog.

Jun 13

Very urgent

Aaand I’m gonna ask you to pray even more, all the more trusting in you kindness.
My Mama seems to be getting better with the issue I wrote about and the menace of surgery is backing away (at least for now), thanks be to God. Buuut incidentally they’ve discovered some kind of bumps in her thyroid and we’re now waiting for results of a test. There’s a strong chance it’s just something harmless and I simply refuse to believe for a second it could be anything bad, but… I would really appreciate it if you please prayed it’s nothing bad. Please.

Anonymous said: Praying for your family as requested. May God look after all of you.

Thank you so, so much! First and foremost for your prayers, but also for your kindness and thoughtfulness in taking the time to write to me. Even though I’m only replying now, your message moved me when I first read it and has been a great help and comfort since, truly.

Let me also thank here everyone else who prayed for my family. The fact alone that my request post has 52 notes - assuming each note roughly represents at least one person who prayed, it’s just mindblowing. It really is the unity of Church at work and it’s been overwhelming to experience it. And when I say “experience”, I don’t just mean being surprised with the number, I mean that this support and prayers were felt and cherished. I can’t put it in words well at all, but I just want to tell everyone how grateful I am for this incredibly beautiful community.

And since I’m talking about the Tumblr Christians, I also want to separately thank every non-Christian follower of mine who prayed, too, I know your blessings were a part of the many graces that my family’s received in this difficult time.

May 15


Guys, I’d like to ask you to pray for my family, there are two issues going on, both very dangerous and urget, though I guess one more so than the other…

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My Grandma died yesterday at dawn. I’m grateful for all prayers for her health and now soul. I guess God decided it was time to give her the greatest happiness already…

Please, keep my Mama and my family in your prayers still. Especially my Mother, this intention is only the more important (it’s all hardest on her and every second of stress affects her health).

May 13

Guys, I’d like to ask you to pray for my family, there are two issues going on, both very dangerous and urget, though I guess one more so than the other…

Read More

Apr 27
  • So I’d thought I set up a queue for Easter as I knew I wouldn’t be here much and also it’s kind of the most important week and then Day and then week of the year, y’know, so it’d be nice to celebrate it on my blog
  • I didn’t
  • everything’s in the drafts
  • I only noticed now
  • jestem konkursową pierdołą
  • also it’s not only the end of the Easter octave today, but also the Sunday of Divine Mercy AAAAND the canonisation of John Paul II and John XXIII and I haven’t posted anything on that, either
  • but I’m not angry at myself for this part because I was just really busy - to top all the above up, it’s my Brother’s birthday, so I was celebrating all day.
  • My future Bhabhi is the nicest person on Earth and they make SUCH a gorgeous couple with my awesome Brother I sometimes just can’t
  • My Mama makes mind-blowingly good cakes
  • I only wish I could’ve spent my other Brother’s birthday with him, too (it was couple of days ago), but he’s busy and they didn’t even celebrate it on their own :(
  • We are all getting so old it’s not even funny anymore
  • I’m happy because not only I watched (took part in) the canonisation mass, but also we all happened to go to a church that has relics of JPII and could kiss them so asdfghjkl God does things like that
  • I have so much to blog about and need to get back to it but also I reaaaally should start focusing on studying for the end of the year and such, I don’t even want to think about deadlines for my essays, and gosh I’m starting to feel faint already… So I guess the result is going to be that I’ll be procrastinating both studies and the blog because I’m such a good and sensible person. Hopefully not. It’s the Sunday of Divine Mercy today, after all.

Apr 20

Happy Easter, everybody!!

To all of you who are Christian - let’s rejoice on the Most Important Day In History because we are loved so much as to be saved and born anew! I hope we all are woken up from the sleep of death, led out of the grave into the Light and begin Life in the name of the Saviour. Have a most happy and holy Easter! To all of you who are not Christian - I wish you have a gorgeous day, however you spend it, possibly with your loved ones! To all of you - I wish you are given all the graces that you need and that every day your life is overflowing with Joy and Hope and abundant blessings, may you and your families be happy and peaceful! Thank you so much for being here - I truly wish God keeps you and gives you all health, happiness and prosperity! :))

Apr 15

Tu hi toh hai, khayal mera,

Tu hi toh hai, karaar mera,

Jhoothe nashe, jahan mein kabhi,

Tu hi toh hai, khumar mera

(via tanipartner)

(via onlykelly23)


akshay-ishq replied to your post “Hey! Glad to hear that you are staying busy. Am mourning Akki’s magnificent beard with you...

" Btw, you’ve reminded me how desperately I wish for good directors for Akshay. I feel like even the best ones he’s had haven’t quite managed to tap into his full potential yet." „ OMG , i agree.


Thanks! It does feel good to be reassured I’m not just being delusional lol

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